I thought today will just be another ordinary weekend, but it wasn’t. I have to write this down so I won’t forget. Today is one of those magical days when God just feels so tangible. He’s so close that’s it’s pulling a thread in my heart. I’m not okay but I am in His presence.
Again and again.
The mass today is just so personal for me. It’s like a replay of my favorite revelations of all time. Two points hit me:
1. Be Brave. During the Homily about the disciples hiding after Jesus’ death, I recalled all my shortcomings. I’m naturally afraid to step up and I fancy mediocrity. Facing the truth of my faults was freeing. When I reveal my true imperfect self before God, He does not condemn. Instead, He hugs me tighter. He overlooks my mistakes, and rejoices the fact that I came to Him today. This kind of love is truly out of this world, almost scandalous. I felt shame but it was overpowered by His love.
2. Peace. Constantly on my prayer, Father reassured me today that the fact that I feel at peace even through I’m right in the middle of a storm, is a sign that God is strong in me. It’s a certain feeling or impression that I cannot put into words. But I guess if I to try to describe it, it’s like “I’m not supposed to be okay. But I am”
Only God can give you peace.